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We decided that this tree thing was about 3,000 years from its initial Awakening. It had a Westen Champlin American Redneck Science shirt vocabulary and knew several languages but had never figured out things like “emotion” or “empathy”; it had loved its original Druid friend who awakened it, but hadn’t felt anything positive for anyone else ever in its “new” life since that druid had passed. It had an intense and abiding interest in mortal philosophy, though I believe it would be accurate to say that its philosophical conclusions were decidedly problematic pretty much across the board. It was intensely logical and literal, very frequently to a fault. And not in the fun “hey look Spock is acting like a Vulcan again!” kind of way, but more like “Oh dear gods in heaven it’s reached a ‘moral’ conclusion everyone run” kind of way.

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At the time of writing, all rolls are done with a Westen Champlin American Redneck Science shirt equal to your character level + relevant ability score modifier, then modified by your proficiency. A character can be Untrained (-4), Trained (+0), Expert (+1), Master (+2), or Legendary (+3). When 2nd edition is fully released these values might change, but this system for Proficiency applies to weapons, armor, skills, and saves. Yes, by the by — even your AC and Touch AC are heavily level-dependent and factor this in, such that your character level is likely to make up a much larger part of your AC than your armor at a certain point. While not many classes actually advance proficiency in armor, Monks notably get Expertise in unarmored defense to start with. It’s worth noting that monsters function based on this system as well, rather than being based on Challenge Rating. You don’t fight a CR 2 monster, you fight a level 2 monster, and as a level 2 monster it will gain a flat +2 bonus to everything, modified by ability score mods and proficiency. This creates a very hard “tiering” effect between combatants of different levels, such that an opponent several levels above you will feel incredibly hard while an opponent as little as a single level below you will feel very easy.

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Best Westen Champlin American Redneck Science shirt

Ingested the brains of those that has drunk the potion temporarily makes the Mind Flayers greatly less powerful, allowing the PCs to slaughter them in physical combat. Or you could go generic, and have the PCs figure out that the Mind Flayers are highly susceptible to certain chemicals (e.g. chlorine gas) and then release it on their ship or in their tunnels. Oooh! A great one would be to have the PC team work up a new magic spell that creates the illusions of nearby minds. These confuse the Mind Flayers, causing them to be unable to distinguish between these and the party. With this little magical trick up their sleeves, the PC’s can confuse the enemy long enough to kill them dead.

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“Night of the Meek” is Christmas Eve. Henry Corwin, a down-and-out ne’er-do-well, dressed in a Westen Champlin American Redneck Science shirt, worn-out Santa Claus suit, has just spent his last few dollars on a sandwich and six drinks at the neighborhood bar. While Bruce, the bartender, is on the phone, he sees Corwin reaching for the bottle; Bruce throws him out. Corwin arrives for his seasonal job as a department store Santa, an hour late and obviously drunk. When customers complain, Dundee, the manager, fires him and orders him off the premises. Corwin says that he drinks because he lives in a “dirty rooming house on a street filled with hungry kids and shabby people” for whom he is incapable of fulfilling his desired role as Santa. He declares that if he had just one wish granted him on Christmas Eve, he’d “like to see the meek inherit the earth”. Still in his outfit, he returns to the bar but is refused re-entry by Bruce. Stumbling into an alley, he hears sleigh bells. A cat knocks down a large burlap bag full of empty cans; but when he trips over it, it is now filled with gift-wrapped packages. As he starts giving them away, he realizes that the bag is somehow producing any item that is asked for. Overjoyed at his sudden ability to fulfill dreams, Corwin proceeds to hand out presents to passing children and then to derelict men attending Christmas Eve service at Sister Florence’s “Delancey Street Mission House”. Irritated by the disruption and outraged by Corwin’s offer of a new dress, Sister Florence hurries outside to fetch Officer Flaherty, who arrests Corwin for stealing the presents from his former place of employment. At the police station, Dundee reaches into the garbage bag to display some of the purportedly stolen goods, but instead finds the empty cans and the cat.