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This character was a hit with the other players primarily because I played it like some kind of The sexy face never stop studying shirt wood golem version of Abathur from Starcraft 2. It was focused purely on improvement; acquisition of new magics, acquisition of new schematics for articulation of joints or wood treatment processes to increase hardness of its blade hands, acquisition of political capital with those who had the resources and connections to provide further insight into how to self-improve, etc etc etc. This is why it was a rogue, after all. Assassination-for-hire can be lucrative and connect you with all of the right people. It was entirely indifferent to the plight of every living thing except: 1) Druids, as it maintained a deep and abiding affection for the druid that it had spent its first two centuries standing guardian over, 2) other Awakened creatures/plants, as it knew the pain and confusion that comes from being Rebirthed as a sentient object even when the Father-who-hath-Wrought-You is loving and kind, and 3) domestic house-cats, because it thought tiny fuzzy unstoppable murder factories were hilarious in concept and adorable in execution.

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A lot of the complaints new DMs have is how the players derailed their campaigns and all the The sexy face never stop studying shirt work they did. This makes them want to run the next sessions more on rails so their work doesn’t get wasted. This is a mistake and frankly a no-no for any DM. Never get too attached to your scenario and always be prepared to roll with whatever the players are trying to do. Be fair about it. I let the dice decide if their antics and shenanigans work or not, all within reason. Many times my players attempt tricks to avoid combat or make thing easier, but if the roll goes badly or their reasoning wasn’t good enough for me I let them crash and burn. Yet there are times when I even let them have a free dragon kill because their argument was convincing and they rolled good enough.

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Emen Bloodbinder the Ruthless of Narfell. Hilariously, the The sexy face never stop studying shirt  of Bloodbinder Orcs is a Kobold. Remember that bit from above about the Bloodbinders stealing children? Well, they stole a clutch of Kobold eggs on an unexpected raid, and Emen was the only one who hatched. (Azuch may or may not have been sent to smash all of the eggs some years back. He didn’t get there in time.) They wanted Kobolds for some of that natural dragon sorcery that a lot of them have, but Emen just wasn’t born with that genetic lottery. He did, however, turn out to be an excellent Enchantment Wizard, and quickly became the golden child of the tribe as a result. It’s gone to his head since then, and he’s ceased working hard in later years. (For anyone who knows Orcish names and is going “Waaaiiit, isn’t Emen a girl’s name?” Yes, and that’s intentional. According to Volo’s, Kobolds can slowly change sex, and Emen has a tendency to do that himself every few years. He likes his name, though, so that never changes.)

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“Night of the Meek” is Christmas Eve. Henry Corwin, a down-and-out ne’er-do-well, dressed in a The sexy face never stop studying shirt, worn-out Santa Claus suit, has just spent his last few dollars on a sandwich and six drinks at the neighborhood bar. While Bruce, the bartender, is on the phone, he sees Corwin reaching for the bottle; Bruce throws him out. Corwin arrives for his seasonal job as a department store Santa, an hour late and obviously drunk. When customers complain, Dundee, the manager, fires him and orders him off the premises. Corwin says that he drinks because he lives in a “dirty rooming house on a street filled with hungry kids and shabby people” for whom he is incapable of fulfilling his desired role as Santa. He declares that if he had just one wish granted him on Christmas Eve, he’d “like to see the meek inherit the earth”. Still in his outfit, he returns to the bar but is refused re-entry by Bruce. Stumbling into an alley, he hears sleigh bells. A cat knocks down a large burlap bag full of empty cans; but when he trips over it, it is now filled with gift-wrapped packages. As he starts giving them away, he realizes that the bag is somehow producing any item that is asked for. Overjoyed at his sudden ability to fulfill dreams, Corwin proceeds to hand out presents to passing children and then to derelict men attending Christmas Eve service at Sister Florence’s “Delancey Street Mission House”. Irritated by the disruption and outraged by Corwin’s offer of a new dress, Sister Florence hurries outside to fetch Officer Flaherty, who arrests Corwin for stealing the presents from his former place of employment. At the police station, Dundee reaches into the garbage bag to display some of the purportedly stolen goods, but instead finds the empty cans and the cat.