We couldn’t afford to move again, especially away from my Gym Rabbit Weightlifting Bodybuilder Bunny T shirt , now more medicated than ever and sleeping her life away in an institution. I completely withdrew from everything aside from schoolwork. I stopped doing the goth thing and invested in a strict wardrobe of button down shirts and slacks. I made a few cautious friends in some of the tech clubs I joined. I became a Mathlete. I poured myself into normalcy and into the possibility of a calm, uneventful adulthood. My father poured himself a few thousand drinks, and found a nice comfy solace in the bottom of a glass.
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I was accepted to a state university with enough scholarships to give me a full ride as long as I coupled Gym Rabbit Weightlifting Bodybuilder Bunny T shirt with a work study program. I declared my major early- pharmaceutical chemistry. An homage to my earlier days obsessed with the occult, and a “fuck you” to the small town gossips: the brother of the witch, going to school to essentially perfect the age-old art of making potions. It was a heavenly six hours away from the town I grew up in, far away from the stigma, the stories, and the quizzical, sometimes hostile looks. The only times I went home were to drag my father out of his stupor to visit my sister at the institution. Until the most recent trip, when he finally drank away the house and I came home to pack everything up to move him into an apartment.
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