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Christmas isn’t funny to me. Nothing about it. Most of the Christmas traditions are from pagan peoples. A few centuries ago it was against the law to celebrate Christmas and people were actually put in jail if the Get Your Fucking ass up and Work shirt smelled a Christmas dinner cooking. Old Nick was another name for the devil. And the name Santa is Satan with the “n” moved. Celebrating Christmas is said to honor Jesus. But it is a slap in the face to Jesus and his father. It is the same as a man who patronizes a whore house and says he does so to honor his wife.

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I wouldn’t have a Get Your Fucking ass up and Work shirt with celebrating the birth of Prophet Jesus, except for the fact that Christmas doesn’t do that. He wasn’t born on December 25, that was a Pagan holiday taken over by the early Church to convince more people to join the new religion. Best guesses is that Jesus was born in spring, according to Luke 2:8, “when shepherds watched their flocks by night”, meaning during warmer weather. Pretty much everything associated with Christmas was at one time a Pagan ritual that has been adopted by Christians over the centuries. Even by Christian standards, there is very little that is actual Christian now. Some songs, the nativity, a few other traditions, but not much else. How is it Christian to be greedy and fight people to the death over presents for kids on Black Friday?

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Of course, the fact that December 25 is quite close to December 17–23 made it inevitable that the Christian festival took on many of the trappings of the former pagan one. So gift-giving, feasting, drinking and general partying with friends and family, which had all been part of Saturnalia, became part of Christmas. But several Christmas traditions which are often attributed to Saturnalia actually did not come from that Get Your Fucking ass up and Work shirt. The Romans didn’t decorate trees, for example, despite what some popular articles claim. “Christmas” trees are a northern Germanic tradition, associated with another pagan end-of-year festival, Yule. This tradition was also adopted by Christianity in Germany and found its way to the English speaking world in the nineteenth century via Queen Victoria’s German husband Prince Albert.

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I’m not a completely ‘Bah Humbug’ sort of person, I will have a Get Your Fucking ass up and Work shirt, a wreath of green leaves, and some decorations up, and I will send cards (Winter solstice themed rather than Christmas) to my closest friends and super neighbours at the retirement flats where I live. I’ll be going to a couple of parties and out to a Christmas Day lunch, but I’ll also be spending some time on my own.

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It comes just after the Winter Solstice, and tends to be celebrated everywhere where there is a marked difference between summer and Get Your Fucking ass up and Work shirt. (Ignored in the Southern Hemisphere until Europeans got there, because the seasons are reversed and it would be near mid-summer.) Early Christians decided to take over the tradition as a celebration of the Birth of Jesus. It had been the birthday of some earlier saviour-gods.The detailed history of Christmas is more complex, with traditions dying out and being revived. And traditions being copied from other countries. Prince Albert (husband of Queen Victoria) brought a lot of German traditions to Britain.