I had a boyfriend who wanted me to cook for him. He was somewhat overweight and thought that Freddy Krueger Jason Voorhees Michael Myers shirt cooked food would help with his diet. He knew I cooked and he would come over for dinner. When I cooked, I tried to make extra, so that I could have leftovers (so i wouldn’t have to cook all the time). He would eat his portion, and then proceed to help himself to what was left. Every. time. I confronted him about it, nicely, like “You said you were on a diet. Why are you eating more than these portions?”
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my ex girlfriend got drunk, drove to my house at 2am, banged on the door, punched me in the Freddy Krueger Jason Voorhees Michael Myers shirt, threatened to kill my new girlfriend, spit on me, and then fell down in my front lawn screaming that I had punched her (which I hadn’t) and threatened to call the police.I had an ex who did that falling down thing too, trying to make the neighbors think that I had knocked her on her ass so that they’d all be witnesses for her if/when she called the police. Fortunately, it was pretty late, and nobody looked outside and/or gave a fuck, so her plan was thwarted.