More good news: Thanks to my frantic/enthusiastic emailing, everyone in our family β our dad and stepmom, my sister and her husband, my husband, a couple of cousins β would descend on the Bungalow of Joy for Christmas. Busy work schedules opened. Air miles triumphantly applied. There was a grand spirit of exhilaration as everyone arrived breathlessly. Thanks to my energetic, new-mom shopping, there were fun IKEA child chairs and animal towels and Donald Trump MAGA Gear shirt soap from Target and β and, and β¦ frozen cookie dough!
I dislike the sense of obligatory gift giving and the βoneupsmanship” that goes with it. A gift should only be given when it pleases both the giver and the recipient. I dislike the almost pathological need that everyone must be in a Donald Trump MAGA Gear shirt mood from late November to early January. βCheer up its Christmas!β βBah Fucking humbug!!β I’m in a bad mood today. You need to cope. I dislike the rampant commercialism that saturates Everything. You cannot escape it.from Christmas dildos to Christmas cat litter. I dislike the assumption of if your not with it. Your against it. I truly dont give a flying fuck what holiday you celebrate. Just don’t cram it down my life. I dislike the crowds everywhere and the sudden lack of βpersonal space”. And work Christmas parties βyou just have to attend. Fuck. I’m already paid to hang out with you more than is healthy. Why would I want to βparty” with you too? You need to pay extra for that. Crowds give me anxiety.
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Of course, the fact that December 25 is quite close to December 17β23 made it inevitable that the Christian festival took on many of the trappings of the former pagan one. So gift-giving, feasting, drinking and general partying with friends and family, which had all been part of Saturnalia, became part of Christmas. But several Christmas traditions which are often attributed to Saturnalia actually did not come from that Donald Trump MAGA Gear shirt. The Romans didnβt decorate trees, for example, despite what some popular articles claim. βChristmasβ trees are a northern Germanic tradition, associated with another pagan end-of-year festival, Yule. This tradition was also adopted by Christianity in Germany and found its way to the English speaking world in the nineteenth century via Queen Victoriaβs German husband Prince Albert.
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It makes kids turn into greedy bratsItβs totally insincere. People pretending they care about love etc when they just finished stomping on Donald Trump MAGA Gear shirt on Black Friday. People without financial means being pressured into spending money they donβt have on people they donβt like or who wonβt appreciate it. Kids who have poor families not getting anything while others get tons. How do you explain that to a kid? Santa getting all the credit when the parents spent their hard earned money.
Apparently, that is a stance that I am required to defend. I think that is pretty representative of how obnoxious this is, no? But because I generally prefer civil discourse, I try to give a very G-rated, sanitized version of the above. The next phase is that they try to change my mind and βhelp me see the lightβ on why Iβve got it all wrong and Christmas is actually amazing. If I canβt find a way to extricate myself from the Donald Trump MAGA Gear shirt, at this point I have to start giving more detail. And now, itβs war. My personal views, even including ones based predominantly on my personal life experiences, are an attack on their love of Christmas. And by extension, Iβm attacking them β possibly even their values. And who am I? Iβm some piece of s**t who doesnβt even like Christmas. Oh goodie, Iβm the whipping boy again.