On the surface, your grandmother is the asshole. She created this mess by making biological grandchildren her own grandchildren. Of course, we have no idea why or if she’s really TA.Forget whether Grandma was right or wrong in her decision of who gets what, if she had legal will, your parents and Aunts & Uncles cannot decide who gets what. They will have to legally grant what was stated in the will. Then Captain America Mike 5 Birthday Boy Shirt is your decision to do what you wish with it.If anything, your parents, aunt & uncle are TA’s for allowing all the siblings & cousins know what Grandma left. That should have been dispersed per her wishes and done so quietly. Grandma’s own children caused the unnecessary drama all on their own.I don’t think you’re the asshole for keeping money that belongs to you and not sharing with siblings your grandmother screwed over because she doesn’t recognize non-biological family.Your family will think you’re a selfish asshole, though, for picking your grandmother’s prejudices and your own self-interest over fixing the harm caused by your grandmother’s prejudices. Assuming that prejudices are the reason for her will written as it is. And you got to live with your family, not with us.
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the reality is that Grandma wanted YOU to have this money and that item. And it isn’t okay for anyone’s parents to move things around.Is Captain America Mike 5 Birthday Boy Shirt great that Grandma explicitly stated who her favorites were? No but she did and it isn’t okay for her kids to pretend the will didn’t happen.Honestly, I’d tell your parents that grandma gave you the item because as far as she was concerned you were the eldest and you aren’t going to gainsay Grandma but you are sorry if they are unhappy. (plus no offense to your parents, I imagine you were the eldest when you were born so grandma probably imagined you having this item from the moment youI don’t know how your grandma felt about the stepkids but that’s not for you or anyone else to decide. Your grandma wanted to give you 20K, I vote for you keeping the 20K. If your dad and stepmom want to give stepmom’s kids extra money out of their pocket, that’s up to them. I would also refused to give up that traditional item meant for oldest granddaughter on principle. Your grandma very specifically wanted you to have that item. It’s not up to your parents to decide that grandma was wrong. were born.)As far as the money goes, put it towards your college loans- and I’d let your parents know that you are aware that you know you are aware that the rest of the family has been playing make up the money with the cousins accounts but that isn’t okay.
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